Already Broken
by oneamsoundstage
Summary: “How could you possibly break me when I’m already broken?” Annette is about to get hers. KS
1. Vertical Thoughts

_I obviously do not own any of the Cruel Intentions characters or storylines from the original movie. However, I do own new story plots and characters I make on my own._

Chapter 1

They say that love cannot be found in the souls of evil-doers. If only, they had known the two souls that were trapped in a hospital room somewhere in New York City.

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All I felt was pain as I slowly awakened from unconsciousness. I began to rack my brain as to where I was. Oh yes, Ronald and the moment of heroism I had towards that blonde bitch. If only Kathryn could see me now. Suddenly, I noticed a figure leaned forward from a chair on my right that had grasped my hand before falling asleep on my bed. I turned my head, as much as I could seeing as how I had a neck brace, to recognize this mysterious person. The figure shifted its head and I saw it was Kathryn. With as much strength as I had, I squeezed her hand lightly to wake her up. Like a cat, she pounced back and had to adjust her vision to collect her bearings. As her eyes shifted around the room, she finally settled on me and realized I had awakened. We stared at each other for a few beats before I broke the silence between us.

"We went too far." I stated.

"We did." She said.

Her eyes were red-rimmed and vulnerable to me. Where did the patronizing stare I was accustomed to? Why was she showing me mercy? She then turned her face away from my stare. I noticed her body had gone rigid and her hand squeezed mine more tightly.

"Why did you leave me?" She asked.

"Why did you push me away?" I rhetorically answered.

Her head snapped back in my direction and we began to stare into each other; trying to find the answers to our questions. We admitted silently after a few minutes that we knew the answers. We were yet again playing a game on each other. It was like gambling. It's hard to break old habits. We sadly smiled at each other at the predicament.

I pulled my hand away from her grasp and brought it up her face to stroke her left cheek. I felt her heat pressure rise up and gingerly used my thumbs to wipe away a few glimmers of tears that had appeared in her eyes.

"I love you."

"If you did, we wouldn't be here right now."

"So this is all my doing?"

"You're the reason why I'm in this god-forsaken hospital."

Silence continued to take hold of the room. Moments later, a ray of light appeared through the window shades. Our bodies instinctively twitched from the invasion.

"Did you think it was easy for me?"

"Can you honestly tell me you wished you could have changed the outcome?"

"I can't change overnight."

"And I could!"

"You were drifting away from me. What else could I have said to keep you from leaving?"

I stared at her trying to see if she was playing me again. She was breaking in front of me and my resolve fell away. I moved the palm of my hand slowly down her face till I reached the crook of her neck.

"I'm yours." I whispered before I forcefully drew her to me and kissed her with all the hidden love I stowed in my heart.

We fell back together into our world of darkness. A mingling of passion, secrets, and flaws. A world where no one lived except ourselves. Light was weakness. Light was a fake reality. Light could not support our souls like darkness. It couldn't handle our injuries, our flaws, and certainly not our need of revenge for being marked.

She pulled away after her need of oxygen triumphed over her need to devour me.

"Why did you leave me?"

I'll tell you this much. She was as persistent as they come. I decided to fuck all the rules we created between us and open up to her. I was already pretty damn physically injured. What more could she possibly do to make me feel more pain?

"I wanted to continue to feel for something, something other than our world. I wanted to know what caring for something innocent felt like…"

Her body jolted and moved away from me. Her cold façade was back on.

"But what I came to realize was there is no such thing as innocence in this world. I had tainted her; she was no longer good and perfect. And the fact that I had already become her ball and chain disgusted me. I became someone she could mold into a perfect boyfriend. What made her different from all the New York debutantes that tried to do the same? After racking my brain, I realized she wasn't different. I could never be hers to own." I paused. "I don't know why I saved her. I think there's some heroic gene in me I had no idea about. "

She smirked at the last statement and seemed to be happy with my answer. However her face fell soon after and she went into a long contemplation.

"How do you know I won't break you?"

"How could you possibly break me when I'm already broken?"

We exchanged our trademark smirks at each other. The intensity in the air was lifted and she relaxed herself.

"So how long am I going to be stuck in this fucking hospital room? I'm not going to be handicapped am I?"

"Well I did hear the doctor saying something about your spinal cord being severely fractured."

"I'm assuming from your tone that you're ecstatic with my predicament."

"Ecstatic doesn't even begin to describe my happiness."

I glared at her in response.

"Oh stop being such a drama queen. The doctor said you're going to make a full recovery. Don't be too happy. There's a lot of physical training you're going to have to go through before your back is completely healthy again. I think they said something about releasing you in a month or so."

"Sounds like I'm going to be bored out of my mind then."

"Not unless you want to help me plan our revenge on Dorothy."

"What did you have in mind?"


	2. Demons Never Sleep

_I do not own the rights to the movie or the storylines and characters within it._

"**Unless you beat a snake to death, it will cause endless trouble in the future.**"

Physical training turned into a pain in the ass. It took me four months before I felt like my old self. Every day I had to wake up at 7am in the morning to start training: lifting my damn legs up while I screamed in agony, and do all that other bullshit so I could walk and live like a normal person again. Of course, everyday my darling stepsister would be there every second of the journey I took to regaining my health. Don't get me wrong, I am very fond of her company. Excluding the times when she is an absolute bitch towards anyone and everyone when things don't go her way. But I was most absolutely annoyed to no end and deep-down embarrassed, when she would laugh like a fucking hyena at me when I fall down on my ass after a grueling exercise or any other humiliating thing I did during these four months' time. She always noticed the blood rushing to my face and kept saying I was acting like a baby and in turn always start to coo at me. All I could do was groan and grunt in response.

This didn't even begin to explain the half of my torture. The big cherry on top of all this was I wasn't allowed to have sexual activity in fear of cracking a bone or injuring my back. The good news was I didn't have to see Annette since I had the doctor tell her that nobody was allowed to see me except for my immediate family. Being the stupid bitch that she is, she bought it and let me be. Unfortunately for my sanity, she did call and I would always have to act like a puppy that lost a leg. After each phone session, my hatred for her would grow and she would further infuriate me with her treatment.

Kathryn would always be there to stop me from committing suicide. And believe me, I really did feel like finishing the job the cab driver started from wanting to puke in disgust numerous times at having to talk to Annette. I really can't imagine my life without Kathryn. Her sarcasm and mocking eyes would always bring me back to reality. Four months felt like a lifetime of pain. She made it tolerable. She made it livable. Late at night, she would sneak into my room and just allow me to hold her. I make a guess that she allows me the comfort of attaining her (like no man ever has) to make up for her mockery when sunlight illuminates our surroundings.

The training finally ended earlier today, or if we're being technical about it yesterday afternoon. The first act I threw myself into was getting my sex life back. After I quickly shooed the trainer out of the apartment, I picked Kathryn up and proceeded to ravish her. And let me tell you, your first time with Kathryn is like no other. It is a high of fire meeting lava. It burns you, raises your temperature to the sky and you feel as if you can never have sex with another woman again. And somehow it's heavenly all at once: the perfect fusion of our bodies, how when I look into her jade-like eyes it doesn't only contain lust but something more, and when she yells my name in ecstasy (she never calls out a prey's name).

**0000**

It is hours later before we speak in coherent words. In the dead of night, our sanctuary. I had been stroking her smooth and flawless cheek when she opened her beautiful eyes which held a feeling of contentment.

"What's her greatest weakness?" she asked me.

We had not seriously spoken about or planned for our revenge ever since the first time I woke up from my coma that day in the hospital. She had needed time to think as had I, though our attention was drawn away from our need for vengeance for quite some time due to my health. I was slightly taken aback when she presented me the above question but I quickly hid my shock with a look of smugness.

I smirk as I am about to reply. "Me."

She rolls her eyes at me. "Do we really need to further stroke your overgrown ego?"

"I wouldn't say we need to stroke my ego. More like stroking something else that hasn't had attention in a while."

"Jesus, you're a sex maniac. We just did it two hours ago."

"You know how long I've gone without sex? I would have preferred to have gone all night long but no, somebody couldn't keep up." I said in mockery.

"WE WERE FUCKING LIKE BUNNIES FROM SUNSET TILL MIDNIGHT! I STILL FEEL FUCKING NUMB. I'm pretty sure I won't be able to walk when morning comes thanks to you. And your need for sex is starting to wear thin. I'm exhausted, Sebastian. Are we going to lay here all night talking about your sexual needs or are we going to hatch a plan to destroy the blond airhead?"

I huff in mock anger and pretend to contemplate Annette's demise for a minute. My silence irritates her more than my words. I continue to remain in deep thought as she starts twisting in my arms in anxiousness.

"I don't know how I put up with your…" she says angrily at me as she starts to move away.

"What if we concocted a diary?" I quickly say to shut her pretty little mouth up and to stop her jerky movements.

After I found I caught her attention, I pulled her closer to me. "We could write, in her handwriting, dormant psychotic thoughts about her last boyfriend what's-his-name and myself. Make it seem like she's a clingy psychopath and in desperate need of clinical attention. How her life revolves around the boys she involves herself with. We could make numerous photo collages of her boy obsessions. Photoshop creations of herself in a wedding dress and me or her ex in a suit walking down the aisle."

She smiles wickedly as her wheels start turning in that puzzling mind of hers.

"You know Valmont? I think this might actually work. We'll have to call Blaine about this later."

"When he's not getting deep throat from some guy in that kinky bedroom of his or sleeping off the alcohol he consumed from that party we missed. In the meantime, what do you say we fuck in that position you were talking about earlier before you fell asleep on my chest?"

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**My deep apologies for taking over three months to update. I guess that's what happens when your schedule keeps piling up with obligations and when people keep needing you to do things. The writer's block is a pain in the ass too. Fortunately I was able to gauge my mind with words tonight for an update that has taken too long. Enjoy and let me know what you think by reviewing.**

to Katie: I'm glad you liked it. I want to make Annette suffer but I can't seem to figure out a way to write it. Hopefully it'll come to me soon. You never know with me.

to Bonjour Bonito: thank god you didn't find my writing sappy or exaggerated. I'm going for raw thoughts and words. Hopefully that comes across. I hate stories with clichéd plotlines and sickening descriptions about what people are feeling.


	3. 2AM Releases

He asked me "And that's that?" in a tone that didn't betray his mask. Mask #3. Probing. Inquisitive. Indifferent. With a hint of glee.

I smirk in response.

"She wrote her own fate. We didn't even really have to do much. God, to think she was actually going to be an obstacle. What a waste."

_"How did you know?" came the rasp from her pathetic broken body on the ground. Broken like a porcelain doll faced with the truth of its own ridiculous notions of life. Thinking everything was so goddamn perfect all the time. That perfection was attainable through perseverance and that she could attain it at such an early stage. What a load of fucking shit. Shit that made me want to vomit all my guts out. Right into her mouth. The mouth that never ceased to stop gawking like a fish lost and hopeless. Completely unaware._

_I reached out and touched her entirely imperfect hair. Hair that people blindly worshipped, blindly walked into. Then I yanked hard. Just for a second. Satisfied by the predictable yelp. _

"_Ever really looked at yourself in the mirror?"_

_Her bottom lip quivered. God, this girl had no self-control, no composure whatsoever. Zero dignity. It's a miracle she kept the virgin charade up the way she had._

_A mirror forcibly placed in front of her, she was forced to stare._

"_Wake the fuck up."_

_Pull back. And then a silence. When all there is, is your breath and the tumor in the air waiting to be filled._

"_You did this to yourself."_

"_Remember that."_

Lips were suddenly on my neck and moved slowly under my ear. Hot breath. Sucking me in. Hands began massaging my tense shoulders. Thumbs pressing down on just the right muscles that needed release. Mmm. Yes. Just right there. And then a deep. slow. chuckle. My back automatically snaps back up its alert mode. Fucking prick.

"Always so tense. So alert. Like a predator who doesn't give themselves a break, don't you think Blaine? He spoke from behind me.

Teasing lips lightly move up to my ear and whispered very quietly, "Panties wet in need of my cock."

His hands, against the best of my control, felt the slight tremor that went down my spine.

_"I'm terribly sorry for the mess. She threw a bit of a…" one arm gesturing around the room with a sculpted look of concern, "fit."_

_The loony bin aide predictably smiled sympathetically and responded with, "Who would've thought she was willingly letting her father rape her like that? This kind of demented mind set might take a lifetime to cure. Poor kid."_

"_Yes, it's really a tragedy. So much potential lost. I feel awful divulging this but I absolutely think it's imperative she doesn't taint anyone else's minds with her twisted thoughts."_

_And in a voice that read as I'm-only-trusting-this-information-with-you-so-you-must-not-tell-anyone (which only insured that they would and would make Annette's life worse there), Kathryn in a hushed tone said, "Did you hear what her room looked like? Plastered in photos of boys with a lot of photoshop-ed family photos. Some with even her own father like a newlywed couple"_

_The aide listened in earnest, "Disturbing. Perhaps she needs to be separated from the others. Bound up, perhaps."_

_Annette chose at that moment to twitch uncontrollably and start clutching empty air in front of her. Even sedated, she kept playing into my hand. This girl was far too easy._

I felt a sudden chill hit my shoulders as fingers started to push the straps of my dress away towards my arms and I was reminded by the amused look across from me on Blaine's face. In a flash I reached one of my arms behind me, found his right nipple and twisted it hard until he put my straps back in its place.

Turning to face him, I hiss in his ear "How many times have I told you Valmont? No fucking PDA. Even if it is just Blaine."

After the initial grimace had disappeared, a really irritating smirk I wished I could smack or devour (I couldn't quite decide) appeared on his face "You didn't seem to mind when I was sucking on your neck."

"That's one thing. Sucking on my tits crosses some etiquette boundaries don't you think?"

The smirk only grew on his face and I knew I might have to get Blaine to leave so I could discipline Valmont about proper ways to behave in front of guests. It was hard work but someone had to do it.

He turned to avert his lazy gaze towards Blaine and mine stayed a little longer. I could see the traces of gray bags under his eyes. There was a slight slowness in the way he walked around to collapse onto the couch I was sitting in. The kind of collapse a couple of months' work amounted to. A heavy sigh in the way he irritably tugged his tie knot loose and unbuttoning his top two shirt buttons. Kicking off his shoes, he let his body sink into the cushions more.

I handed him the glass of red wine that had been in my hands since he left for that emergency phone call. He took it with a relieved smile. It was finally over.

"_I was going to tell you Sebastian…I…"_

"_When Annette? When were you going to tell me? I was upfront with you about everything and you didn't have the same fucking decency to do the same. Did you think I was actually going to be ok with this?"_

_A large part of me was manipulating her, manipulating the situation. But the other part of me was hit with a sudden realization that I would have been saying these words regardless if I hadn't woken up to my delusions. If I hadn't woken up from my unhealthy obsession that went against everything I was, I would've been saying the same words._

_It was fucked up. I had given her the opportunity to really fuck me up beyond any duct tape could do to my brain._

_I yanked her hair and smashed it into the ground._

"_You don't fucking think. I don't understand how you couldn't have given this more thought. Stupid fucking bitch." I kept yelling through her screams for mercy._

"_Shut the fuck up!" I screamed as I smashed her head into the ground again._

_I couldn't believe I ever saw any attractive traits in her. Couldn't believe that I hadn't seen her flaws sooner._

I was softly pulled back to where I was when I realized Kathryn had found her way onto my lap with her arms around me, leaning sleepily into my neck with one hand massaging the side of my head. She took a sip of the glass of wine that had somehow ended up in her possession again and then gave me a slow kiss. The kind that reminds me without any words that I'm significant to her and not to get lost in my head for too long.

We gradually stopped after a few long seconds. She leaned her forehead against mine and I could tell she was really happy. Happy and exhausted. Blaine just smirked, took a J out, lit it, took a couple hits then passed it to Kathryn.

She took a hit and then passed it into my mouth when she pried it open with her lips. Everything became softer and I finally felt relaxed in a way I hadn't been in what seems too long.

Sounds of cars and people walking around outside in the warm night faded into my ears and out as I let my head lean against hers. One of her hands dropped onto her lap and I lightly started playing with it. Blaine picked up a copy of The Salmon of Doubt on the table between us and leisurely started reading it as he passed the J back to us.

The three of us sat there for a while. The calming smoke and silence was enough for now.

[_]

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So it's been a while. Just had a sudden urge to write this. Hope you enjoyed it.


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